History

"I would love to be one of the 10001. It's history!" katanya setelah gue selesai presentasi.

Lumayan. Kalaupun nanti perusahaannya gak mau jadi partner, setidaknya director-nya terrayu jadi 10001 EP.

9969 to go.

"We really don't mind if you later decide to go with the other company to screen your movie," kata salah satu programmer.

I know u won't. But I would.

I want to make a movie, make a profit, and I want to make it in a fun way. I don't want to waste my life copromising with a system that will only get me rich and miserable.

I want to be rich, happy, dan tentunya trendy.

Kompromi? Ntar aja kalau daya tawar gue lebih tinggi. Jadi tetep gak perlu kompromi=D

"We will get back to you as soon as we talk with the marketing and everything."

Please do. kata gue begging-begging dalam hati.

Dengan penuh percaya diri gue bermobil pergi. Inilah akibatnya kalau kerja pake hati. Belum disetujui, gue udah hepi. Teringat beberapa hari yang lalu gue harap-harap SMS, ketakutan.

Ketika asisten si Batak berdada bidang nelepon, gue langsung hepi.

Eh kebalik ding. Gue hepi dulu, baru si asisten berdada bidang nelpon.

I attract what I think.

Lalalalala...

La?

La gimana ntar kalau ditolak ya?

Apa gue begging-begging aja?

Fifty fifty gimana?

Kerja ama yang lain aja deh. Kayanya lebih berduit.

Lagak lo tuh. Siapa gue?

Lenyap all the hepi-hepi joy joy feeling, yang gue bangun berhari-hari baca buku tebal penyemangat hati.

Fear gets me in just a snap.

FEAR: False Emotion Appearing Real.

Emang kenapa kalau film ini gagal? Toh dunia tetap dunia. Edensor akan tetap tayang. The Bagindas akan tetap berkumandang. Lady Gaga akan tetap ngangkang. Cukup banyak seniman untuk dipuja dan dicela di dunia fana ini. Gak butuh film gua.

Damn.

Gue butuh J Co green Tea.

More! I need cappucino avocado, donut glazzy, dan penganan haram lainnya menurut fatwa Marie France.

Nyummmmm... nikmat surgawi.

Eat. Pray. Love.

At least I get the first step right;D Tinggal berdoa agar love come secepatnya to mama.

Now I have enough endorphin to make history.

No. Not history.

I have enough endorphin to make herstory.

And it starts with Miss Green Tea.